Bros and Their Toes



Do you know what’s really freaking me out in tarawīh at the moment? Bros and their toes!

If there’s someone in my visual range in the row in front of me with anything untoward down there, it starts to unnerve me and I find my concentration will wander.

Like recently I’ve had a couple of bros who’re missing toes and you find yourself checking back every now and then just to make sure you counted correctly.

Then today there was this bro whose “little toe” was bigger than at least the two toes immediately next to it.

But the most off putting was this guy, actually wait let me explain a bit first.

You know that thing that people (normally dads) do where they drum their fingers in sequence on a table to simulate a kind of horse galloping sound?

Well, this guy was drumming his toes during the whole tarawīh. Both feet – simultaneously!

In addition, he kept doing this thing where he’d put his big toe over the one next to it and slide it off really quickly, like he was trying to make a ‘snap’ sound.

Sure, it’d be handy if you were wearing sandals in a restaurant and you needed to summon the waiter really quickly but I hope I’m not alone in feeling it was a tad out of place in salāh.

I could only take four rak’ah’s worth before I had to change my place for both my khushū’ and sanity. Although I’m not sure how much of either I salvaged.

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4 Comments

Filed under Life related stuff

4 responses to “Bros and Their Toes

  1. This post made me laugh out loud, thanks!

  2. Soulscripture

    SubhanAllah! This toe thing aint just a brother thing – and it doesn’t stop there…
    Sisters besides me usually slap there foot over mine during Taraweeh salaah, and then when we’re all squashed up, I get pushed to the side (almost sandwiched) during sujood with an elbow near ma nose that doesn’t belong to me for example….then basically i end up almost sat on during tashshahud…

    Really have to be weary about who I’m stood next too – can drive you insane….

    • I’m with you on the elbow thing. Some brothers insist of having their arms out at exactly ninety degrees to their body in sujūd, oblivious to the impact on where you can place your own arms as a consequence.

      Then if you get one either side of you, your sujūd turns into a game Tetris as you try to fit your head between the space that they’ve so ungenerously not left you.

  3. Soulscripture

    Sooooo know what you mean on that one. Tetris lol is a perfect analogy. Some pieces are often bigger than others so hence the human sandwich. Lol

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